Friday, October 30, 2015

Rant in Estrada Minor: The adventures of Beau and his B.O.

When it comes to aromas, fragrances, Beau had a beautiful name but an awful smell. The type of man worthy of a pictorial or video, he was certainly appealing to at least 3 of 5 senses. Unfortunately his personality was as paper thin as deli sliced salami and his odor ranged much in the same vein, maybe pastrami.

Which goes to show, beauty may be in the eyes of the beholder, but if the smell of someone makes those eyes tear, there’s no way back from that pitfall. Domino effects ensue when he hails a taxi and smoke alarms faint like one of those European Michael Jackson fans.

Still, some brave women endured the stench if only for one night of septic passion with the Dumpster Adonis. The pleasure was almost worth the aftertaste… almost.

You see, Beau’s B.O. was not limited to his skin, but everywhere. It was like a vomit inducing bouquet buffet. The problem is that since smell is directly linked to memory, when women remembered the delicious night of love making, so did their gag reflex.

Beautiful Beau with his horrible B.O.,
An anthropomorphic Pepe Le Peux,
A miasmic maelstrom,
The lover whose touch was forgotten,
But never his scent.

Beautiful Beau with a stench like no other,
Had abs like a God
And a smell to which you would shudder.

Wednesday, October 28, 2015

Dancing outside our comfort zones

Conformity is one of the biggest threats we face in life because reality has a way of teaching you that complacency may let you get past a rough patch, but eventually settling will break you down. As an indie author I make the rules as I go and have the freedom to challenge myself as I see fit and I like being generous with challenges. From coming up with inspirational quotes to seeing how daft and silly I can be, there’s something immensely liberating about looking outside your comfort zone if only to grow further.

As humans, we often draw boundaries of what we can do, what we’re supposed to do and it’s quite telling that many people have their dreams limited by what they think they can or quite often CAN’T do. No outside limitations, just themselves saying their age, gender, physical capacity, and other details are their limits.

To be blunt, I say to hell with that.

Look outside your comfort zone.

Revel in the awkwardness. Rejoice in the challenges of the unknown and discover who you are while walking paths you have yet to tread.

Why should you do this?

Well I counter, why shouldn’t you? Why should you limit yourself? Why should fear be a reason to not try something? Why should self-discovery be limited? Why should we hold back our curiosity and creativity?

I’m constantly looking for different things to challenge myself because it is liberating to see something that I hadn’t done before suddenly become attainable and doable.

Still, so many people look outside of their comfort zone and say no thank you. Not for me.

I’m not talking about death-defying acts of extreme sports, I’m talking about writing, sharing poetry publicly, making a funny video, painting, taking photography classes, cooking, trying new foods and drinks, going to new places and exploring and experiencing. I’m talking about things you say you want to do or wish you could do yet don’t do.

For me, I adore going to new places to taste something I’ve never tasted before. I love reading a variety of topics because I think there’s takeaways in most of we have on offer. I love classic literature, greatly enjoy philosophy, love indie novels, adore fantasy, sci-fi, graphic novels, and beyond. And I don’t limit myself. New and different? I’ll give it a spin. You know why?

How many times has someone said they don’t like something without even trying it?

That’s not me.

I’m the opposite. I’ll give most anything a try and if you see my music collection you’ll see how much I mean that. Sure, there’s a trend in things I like, but I don’t limit myself. The same goes for all my senses. I don’t discriminate in regards to what I watch, listen to, read, eat, wear, or smell. I love new experiences and the more I push to try something new, the more things I find to enjoy.

There’s a life to be lived and we get no medals for limiting or trying everything, but at least in one of those choices you can know for sure and discover a bit of yourself with every new bit of weird you come face to face, and hold your hand out to, so you can offer a dance.

Peace, love, and maki rolls.

Monday, October 26, 2015

For some things the force should not be strong

If you have to force something, that’s the first sign that you shouldn’t. Some people say that you should fight for what is worthwhile and that statement does hold great truth within it… except a lot of people apply it where it shouldn’t be applied.

When you force something, even if you succeed, there’s a high chance an odd taste will be left in your mouth. One that is very likely to not be pleasant. Mind you, this is a lesson that you learn plenty of times in your life because it takes a couple of tries before you realize what you’re doing and think better of it.

Think about it. Those times when some things happen so effortlessly that it was as if you just needed to allow things to happen for them to actually happen. Then think of those times where you’ve had to claw your way to your goal and also think of the satisfaction that gives you. Next, think of those times you’ve had to put so much effort into something and you succeed, but it feels awkward… as if it wasn’t meant to be.

That’s because some outcomes are possibly a bad fit in your life.

There’s an often used adage that says learn to pick your battles and there is so much wisdom in that phrase when you apply it correctly. The trick is that we often bumble things and think there’s a battle worth fighting when there’re actually some situations where a better option is to wait or to even walk away.

But that’s the thing, a lot of people see either of those choices as giving up or failing and certainly in some situations it may be a failure… but would it be the worst thing that can happen? Is it bad to desist from doing something that feels awkward or even disingenuous?

Odds are high that most people have situations where they’d do endless good to themselves by just walking away or taking a breather. But our mindset is so hell bent on doing, on succeeding, on winning that we lose sight of the bigger picture.

What if a job you really want is not the right fit for you? What if one bit of success can lead you to a path of misery or sadness? What if that person you so long for isn’t right for you or vice versa? What if that victory can lead to eventual defeat?

For most of these things your gut is probably smarter than the combined intelligence of your brain and your heart. Your gut jabs at you and says, hey, maybe this isn’t that good of an idea. Maybe this is not what we want or more importantly, maybe this isn’t what we need. The problem is that the heart and the brain are wickedly skillful and know all the tricks and tools to fool you into saying this is a battle that’s worth fighting for.

The thing is that when something is worth fighting for, your gut doesn’t question or waver. It knows that the fight is worth it when it truly is. Meanwhile the brain insists it has the winning strategy and the heart screams that it has the will to conquer all even when the battle at hand is a Catch 22 or worse.

That’s because for life, we need all three, the heart, the brain and the gut… but of the three, one has the most clarity and you don’t have to think that one through… you just need to feel it within, from where your truest force comes.

Peace, love, and maki rolls.

Friday, October 23, 2015

Satellites of Life

People in our lives are sometimes permanent, others are temporary and some come in and out of our lives like some satellite that ebbs into and out of our orbits for periods of time. Each of these types is bound to come across in your life. People you take classes with, people from a particular job or circle of friends, people from grade school, from highschool or even summer camp.

What’s interesting is that some of these people come in and out of your life and it’s not that they’re fickle, it’s just that they’re not permanent staples in our lives and are instead people who do hermit appearances. I know quite a few people like that who pop in and out of my life and it’s always a great joy to see them because I know the movie of my life is going to get a pretty awesome cameo.

I write about this because talking to a friend, we discussed how some people are fickle in our lives and then I made the distinction between fickle and random and they agreed naming three people off the top of his head that do the same.

Here’s the thing, as people we sometimes want people all the time in our lives and other times we even want some out of our lives. That’s all fine and dandy, except life has a way of doing its own thing with no regard whatsoever for your plans and these satellites of life are a lovely reminder of how pleasantly random life can be. You can see these people in the line at the bank, at the mall, at some random shop, or even in a different country.

And that’s a great thing because you can have that little shot of them in your life and something you can often remember positively. It’s all an invitation to flow and enjoy the moment and those you are able to share with the fascinating people in your life. Those who are there for the long run and beyond. That’s because even if someone is out of your life, that doesn’t mean you can’t be open to having a chance encounter and having it be a great positive in your life.

Peace, love, and maki rolls.

Monday, October 19, 2015

The Wishing You Well

Shooting stars, wish bones, rabbits feet, horse shoes… there are so many things we use to make a wish. Still, thinking of life, I’ve seen many people who want nothing more than forgiveness for something they did. It could be something trivial or something massive, yet still, it’s like something that sticks to our sides and doesn’t let us go.

Something we did, something we said, something that happened or something that didn’t happen.

Forgiveness is honestly such an important thing because it gives peace of mind, closure, and helps people let things go that they’ve been holding on to for so long. Seeing the power of words, forgiveness often focuses on what we did wrong when we apologize, which is good, it’s cathartic, but often stops there.

So I got to thinking what if instead of a forgiveness well or a wishing well, we get a virtual wishing you well. By this I mean that sure you can ask for forgiveness, but don’t stop there. Sure you want your peace of mind, but in regards to yourself and that person you wish you could apologize to, what would you wish upon them? What would you like to thank them for? Don’t just say sorry, wish them well.

My thinking is that an apology is good, but to be able to project a positive thought to that person you wronged can augment the impact of your intention.

So enter the Wishing You Well. The idea is for you to leave a comment with your apology or wish for you and that other person, to externalize and express it and to do it anonymously if you wish. I’ve seen websites dedicated to writing secrets and other things, and I wanted to offer my humble blog to anyone who needs to have a few words with the void if only to get things off their chest.

I’ve re-experienced recently the power of verbalizing or writing out something that’s within you and how therapeutic it can be. It’s not that I didn’t know before, it’s just I was reminded of how important it is to express what we feel. It’s helped me and maybe it’ll help someone else who needs a random place to express those words that are stuck inside.

So with that in mind, hope this helps.

Peace, love, and maki rolls.

Sunday, October 18, 2015

Strumming caution to the wind

So for the longest time I've thought about sharing my music as well as my writing. I'm well aware I'm no rock star, though I do enjoy music a lot and an important thing I want is to show that we shouldn't fear what we love. That we should create and feel free to do so. So here's my first musical sharing, an original song called Burden. 

It started out being a sad song though it's evolved with me and grown into a song that's very special to me. 

Btw, I'm well aware the audio isn't the best, that I mumble, and that the guitar isn't perfect lol, still, it's the best I can do for now though trust I'll be working on making better shares in the future. :D 

Hope you enjoy and if you like, comment on youtube or here on the blog. And if you really like, share with someone whom you think would enjoy. 

My thanks. 

Peace, love, and maki rolls.


Wednesday, October 14, 2015

Good causes come in all sizes

I’ve always been interested in supporting good causes and bring whatever awareness I can to things I care about. For me, it’s important to help each other out and that includes large corporations or individual causes.

In regards to large organizations, I recently supported St. Jude’s Research Hospital with a donation to further promote research into child cancer. My mother being a breast cancer survivor, I want to give something back and to give to future generations who are going through something that took all of my mother’s willpower to overcome. When I see what she went through and I see children going through the same, I can’t help but feel absolute pride for their will and their attitude.

I recently did an effort to raise money to donate. When I tallied all royalties, I bumped up the amount and made a donation here. I'll attach my donation at the end of the post.

On previous occasions in my life, I’ve supported Amnesty International, Surfrider Foundation, the Nepal Relief Efforts, The Haiti Relief Efforts, Katrina Relief Efforts and several other institutions. I also support countless efforts by, and because if we can help, we should, be it signing a petition or making a donation (time or money). I intend on further supporting different causes, although I also focus on individual causes.

In regards to individual causes, during the last year, I’ve supported cancer treatment for a patient who is a coworker's sister, donated money to contribute to a patient with ALS who is at risk of losing his home, to aid in the recovery of a professional bodyboarder and also in the case of a good friend who had a terrible car accident and couldn't cover her medical bills. I do this because individual causes are as important as large ones.

Recently, I supported a good friend because she has the dream to study in Ireland and lacks the means to do so. She wishes to study psychology because it was so vital in her life and she wants to give back, a sentiment I can totally relate to. It’s not every day you can help someone achieve their dream and I did my part to help out, because dreamers should be encouraged to dream, especially when it is for a worthy cause. If you’d like to read about her story and help a dreamer out, here’s the link.

To end this post, I’d like to thank you for reading me, for buying my books, for helping me support good causes and for caring. The more we care the better a chance we have to leave something worthwhile to future generations.

My thanks and my best to you, always.

Peace, love, and maki rolls.


PS: Thanks to all who bought, donated directly and supported this cause.

Monday, October 12, 2015

Warts and all

Some time ago, a lovely friend suggested I write about love when it comes to friends, family and partners, especially when it comes to the topic acceptance. So Amy Dionne, this one is for you.


Love is different from one person to the next. It varies in intensity, flavor, type, and texture. For something so intangible it has so many properties and nuances that you can’t help but dispute the claim that it is intangible.

The thing is that there is no set definition for love or the rules to which it obeys. It changes from one relationship to another. Some are fleeting, others are more permanent. Some are short lived but intense. Others are slow burning and can last a lifetime. Truly, nothing is more emotionally heterogeneous than love but at least for me, there’s one vital element in the strongest loves and that’s acceptance.

Love isn’t easy and often requires effort on the part of both sides to make ends meet, to achieve balance and to make sense. Does that mean that love always makes sense? Not by a long shot, but we’re often trying to make sense of it.

Beyond making sense of things, love doesn’t judge or at least the truest love doesn’t judge. Sure it can hurt, it can soar, it can burn, and it can do endless things, but it doesn’t judge.

When you say I love you, it should be warts and all. With flaws and virtues, with what we love about the person as well as with what drives us crazy and invites us to scream to the heavens when people can’t see how easy and simple some things could be if they did things like we do them. Oh yeah, love is silly like that too where you think you’re completely right until you talk things over, although that can apply to many things when you enter dialogue with an open mind… but that’s another post.

Love is seeing someone come out of surgery and think they look beautiful. Love is having someone vomit over you and you still love them. Love is what helps you come down from anger and drop your ego in the interest of trying to find a solution to whatever problem there is. Love is letting a friend say whatever comes spewing out of their mouth and taking it on board and asking them to clarify when they say something way out there. Love is kissing a scar. Love is hearing a friend’s darkest secrets and not judging them for it and instead loving them for having the strength to share with you. Love is seeing someone you care for in a moment of weakness and doing what you can for them even if that means leaving them alone. Love is leaving judgment to the side and doing your best to find the best version of what you share.

It doesn’t always work. It’s far from flawless. It’s hard. It’s painful. It’s draining…. And boy is it worth it.

So here’s to our warts, our scars, our dark secrets, our failures, our virtues, our conquests, our pains and the people whom we love and who love us regardless of how messed up we are.

Peace, love, and maki rolls.

Friday, October 9, 2015

A prayer for the sleepless

Hungry dreamer, break thy fast
Let the slumber come at last.
Clouds for pillows, sands of sleep
Breathe within to fall in deep.

Let go the woes of wary days
Embrace instead that soothing daze.
Sheets of heavenly threads embrace
As fingers curl in the dreamful lace.

Blessed be you in this moment
Take in palm the ferry’s token
Set thy sails for Dreaming’s shore
And let thy wine so gently pour.

Sip this breath and savor the rousing
Of this wave of sleep that’s gently drowsing.
Heavy lids do wish to kiss
Now sleep dear dreamer, in restful bliss.

Rant in E-strada Minor - Marbles and memory

Within calcified cranial confines, marbles dance to and fro. Some brighter than others, size differentiating them, of course, and all perfectly round in the lies I tell myself. The small pouch of memory holds it all, forgetting some, and clickety clacketing replay on favorites from the playlist.

Ah yes, how the mind plays favorites with mental mirages. Inaccurate depictions of what once was and now shall forever kind-of-sort-of-be from what one perspective can recall.

Have you ever rolled a memory in the palm of your hand? Allowed its warm light to tickle your nerves and show you how awful or wonderful something was not?

Memories lie after all...

And so do we.

We tell ourselves a version of a version of a momentary lapse of reality, registered by the distractedly drunken yet omnipresent mind. The subconscious knows all, yet the ego insists on knowing best what is and what had to be.

Rolling, crashing, banging into themselves do these memories fight for attention. Childlike in their hunger to feed their "look at mes".

Remember me

Think of me

Cry because of me, but also smile a bit without knowing why

Memories are wicked little creatures that change through time. Other memories slam into them, blowing sands off the mental dunes we gaze at from the outside in.

All goes a bit nutty when questions start to mingle with memories... sometimes the Hindsight Brigade offers insight... other times a Mexican hat dance ensues over one particular memory. A merry-go-round of obsession looking, searching, prying for a why. Sure, the hows and whats mingle with the who and where, but the why. The why is never ending in certain memories. A dark infinity sign unraveled into a question mark.

Why this

Why that

Why not this

The search for the unicorn of Because, fathered by closure and teasing at peace of mind.

Memories... how they vary, how they differ, how they swear on the truth.

Sometimes bits are forgotten and other times lies are remembered.

But the marbles remain, even if sometimes they are lost.

Wednesday, October 7, 2015

Cloudy with a chance of trying too hard

This is a post for a friend in regards to a situation they’re going through. Cheers, and hope things smoothen up.


Never doubt the ability of a human to be awkward and to try too hard. When it comes to life, things can sometimes flow while at other times, it’s this war of attrition where we insist on winning even if it’s bit by bit by bit. Sometimes it’s a full on stalemate, and other times, well it’s a poor investment of time and effort.

Trying too hard can happen for so many reasons, from loving someone to feeling guilty, to wanting to show you’re worthwhile, to catch someone’s attention, to show you’re worthy of a clique. The reasons are endless but the outcomes are often the same. You see, when you get to thinking you’re trying too hard, one of these things might have happened:

1. There’s no response.
2. You feel awkward and borderline embarrassed.
3. You start liking yourself a little less for insisting.
4. There’s still no response.

The fact is unfortunately that sometimes it’s best to not try anymore. For most posts, you’ll hear me talk about the need to persevere, to endure, to be stronger, to believe and most times this will be the case when it comes to life… but there are occasions where desisting is actually a better option, for however crappy that sounds and it’s something that I feel it needs to be said.

It’s all to do with the time and effort you’re investing. In life, energy and time are finite, and how we invest both will result in actions, reactions, and experiences. For those business-minded folk, this can be understood that trying too hard means that the return of investment does not justify what you put in. In other words, there's better things to invest your time and energy.

If you feel you’re trying too hard, maybe it’s time to stop trying so hard, to let things run their course, to stop forcing (something I’ll write more about in the coming days). But for this post, the focus is on that feeling within that maybe it’s not worth it, whatever “it” is.

Albert Einstein defined insanity as doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Insisting is not the same as perseverance and sometimes we need someone to tell us that.

By the by, there is one caveat with me saying it’s sometimes better to desist… just because you stop insisting on something, that shall NEVER mean I shall recommend you should lose hope. That is NEVER the path or option. But sometimes you have to let things go so that they may fall where they may. I honestly believe that the more we allow things to flow, the better the outcome and maybe the first step needs to come from us.

So keep the time, keep the effort, and keep the hope, because that’s the only thing we must always hold onto.

Peace, love, and maki rolls.

Rants in Estrada Minor - Intro

In my interest to continue pushing my writing and show different sides of who I am as a writer, I'll be preparing some rants for my writing enjoyment and hopefully for your reading enjoyment. Some may be happy, some may be sad... the only rule is for it to be a free write and to be written in one sitting with barely a proofread to be had.

Topics will vary, poetry might make an appearance and the idea is just to write for the love of a good write and to create memorable visuals even if they're not the most logical in the world... let's see how this go, shall we?

Stay tuned.

Monday, October 5, 2015

Everyone has stories within

You have a story within you.

Actually you have SEVERAL stories within you.

I know you've been made to believe otherwise, but there is creativity inside. And a lot of it.

I'm always amazed at how many people say they are not creative, that it's just not in them and I can't help but disagree.

If you talk, if you interact with people, if you like gatherings, if you like gossip or the news, you like stories and probably have a great story to tell.

Don't believe me?

Ok, here are a couple of questions about your day to day life.

What's the most sick you've ever been?

What's the worst injury you've ever had?

Tell me about the best meal you've ever had. 

Write about that person who stole your heart when you were 13. 

What is the best birthday you can remember?

Each of those questions or statements can actually be a prompt for a story. You have friends whom you talk to on the phone... or well, tweet to (seriously how often do you talk to people on the phone nowadays?).

We all have stories from our day to day and the surprise is that those stories are no different in structure than a work of fiction. There's a plot, there's details, there's twists and turns, there's drama. Face it, if you're alive and you're conscious you have stories to tell.

What you also have is the fear of telling them, of putting them down on paper and having someone judge them. Part of you is afraid that your story is lame and hey, we all have that fear and we can all overcome it.

Oh another thing I've often heard is that people "aren't creative". Oh really? Tell me about an excuse you've given for getting into work late or not having your homework ready? Now really tell me how uncreative you are :)

Inside all of us are stories that can help shape the world, that can educate, that can entertain, that can transport someone to another place when they need an escape, that can make someone smile, that can make someone cry, that can make a difference.

So really, are you going to keep that treasure to yourself or are you going to share the wealth within?

Peace, love, and maki rolls.

Friday, October 2, 2015

Method to Madness: Let your stories come to you

All too often I see people frustrated about getting writer's block. It's something that happens and from experience I can tell you that the harder you try to force it out of you, the harder it'll resist.

That's because stories are alive.

They have feelings.

They have a mind of their own and will not be forced to do what you want to do when you want to do it.

That's the very reason why I always have multiple projects running. Some people may accuse me for lack of discipline, but if you see my track record, I've been writing every single day for the last several years with very, very, very few exceptions. If I'm not in the mood to write in one project, I work on a blog post, or a poem, or a haiku, or plot points or new ideas, or something.

The idea for me is to never stop, to always be progressing and to let the project that grabs my attention dictate what I will write that day. Sure I'd like to finish some things first, but that's not how I work and muses are temperamental and not to be messed with.

Some people get desperate and frustrated and I understand that feeling quite well.

I have good news though, if you stop forcing, the story will come. It will assault you in the moment you least expect it, but it'll come. In the meantime, read, watch movies and documentaries, free write, write in your journal, write poetry, write haikus, limericks, riddles, whatever, just write. Loosen up that hand. A block is nothing more than rust you need to clear so the hinges work again. Still, the more you feed the mind, the more ideas will come to you.

You see, an obsessed mind can only focus on one thing and honestly, sometimes you need that. However, other times you need to flow, and for a writer, often times that means letting go.

After all, flowers don't beg bees to come for their pollen, and if you enjoy life, some sunlight, and water your brain, the bees will come... oh how they will come.

Peace, love, and maki rolls.