Monday, October 26, 2015

For some things the force should not be strong

If you have to force something, that’s the first sign that you shouldn’t. Some people say that you should fight for what is worthwhile and that statement does hold great truth within it… except a lot of people apply it where it shouldn’t be applied.

When you force something, even if you succeed, there’s a high chance an odd taste will be left in your mouth. One that is very likely to not be pleasant. Mind you, this is a lesson that you learn plenty of times in your life because it takes a couple of tries before you realize what you’re doing and think better of it.

Think about it. Those times when some things happen so effortlessly that it was as if you just needed to allow things to happen for them to actually happen. Then think of those times where you’ve had to claw your way to your goal and also think of the satisfaction that gives you. Next, think of those times you’ve had to put so much effort into something and you succeed, but it feels awkward… as if it wasn’t meant to be.

That’s because some outcomes are possibly a bad fit in your life.

There’s an often used adage that says learn to pick your battles and there is so much wisdom in that phrase when you apply it correctly. The trick is that we often bumble things and think there’s a battle worth fighting when there’re actually some situations where a better option is to wait or to even walk away.

But that’s the thing, a lot of people see either of those choices as giving up or failing and certainly in some situations it may be a failure… but would it be the worst thing that can happen? Is it bad to desist from doing something that feels awkward or even disingenuous?

Odds are high that most people have situations where they’d do endless good to themselves by just walking away or taking a breather. But our mindset is so hell bent on doing, on succeeding, on winning that we lose sight of the bigger picture.

What if a job you really want is not the right fit for you? What if one bit of success can lead you to a path of misery or sadness? What if that person you so long for isn’t right for you or vice versa? What if that victory can lead to eventual defeat?

For most of these things your gut is probably smarter than the combined intelligence of your brain and your heart. Your gut jabs at you and says, hey, maybe this isn’t that good of an idea. Maybe this is not what we want or more importantly, maybe this isn’t what we need. The problem is that the heart and the brain are wickedly skillful and know all the tricks and tools to fool you into saying this is a battle that’s worth fighting for.

The thing is that when something is worth fighting for, your gut doesn’t question or waver. It knows that the fight is worth it when it truly is. Meanwhile the brain insists it has the winning strategy and the heart screams that it has the will to conquer all even when the battle at hand is a Catch 22 or worse.

That’s because for life, we need all three, the heart, the brain and the gut… but of the three, one has the most clarity and you don’t have to think that one through… you just need to feel it within, from where your truest force comes.

Peace, love, and maki rolls.


  1. much wisdom here i agree but again it's confusing what to pursue and what to give up,...ofcourse forcing is not a good idea...i guess every situation is different and needs to be handled accordingly.....great post,thank you....have a nice day

    1. AH but life is never meant to be easy, dear friend. What to give up is often the harden thing to ask. Happy you enjoyed and thank you for reading, for the comment and for the light you bring forth. Cheers